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Guerrero - Drop Reporter Act on MNF
November 11, 2003
by Ward Lowe

Maybe the execs at “Monday Night Football” heard my cries and felt my pain.  Maybe there is some sanity left in network TV.  Whatever the reason, it appears that Lisa Guerrero’s role on the broadcast has been reduced.  Finally.

I wonder if the Republican National Committee got involved.  First, it pressured CBS to keep “The Reagans” off network TV; maybe it also had enough of Lisa Guerrero?

During last night’s Green Bay-Philadelphia game, Guerrero made a quick, bland pregame report (“tonight’s cold rain might be a factor”) and mercifully wasn’t heard from again until the halftime reports (“So, coach, you seem to be winning/losing. Has the rain affected your team/game plan?”).  I haven’t watched every “Monday Night Football” game this season, but she seemed a lot more involved in earlier weeks.

I understand that the producers of “Monday Night Football” need to lure viewers.  I know that sex sells.  But please, for the love of football, don’t insult viewers’ intelligence any longer by pretending that this woman is a “reporter” who adds insight to the broadcast.  Given her work so far this season, Guerrero obviously was hired as eye candy, so take away the microphone and put her in a cheerleader outfit.

Her “Monday Night Football” career began ominously when she asked Redskins quarterback Patrick Ramsey about what he said to his “ex-teammate Laveranues Coles” before the game.  Ramsey didn’t know how to respond—he and Coles both play for the same team.

Send Guerrero back to playing the designated bimbo on Fox and bring in someone—woman, man, child—who knows what she’s doing.

No One’s Going to Disney World This Year
Last year’s Super Bowl teams, Oakland and Tampa Bay, this season are a combined 6-12. Why are last year’s champs this season’s chumps?

Oakland (2-7) is old and bickering.  The Raiders kept the ancient core of their 2002 team—Rich Gannon (37 years old), Tim Brown (37), Jerry Rice (41)—together for one more shot at a championship, but it’s not to be.  Some players don’t like the way Bill Callahan runs the team, constantly comparing his style to his predecessor Jon Gruden.

The 2002 AFC conquerors gave up this season when things weren’t going their way and will spend January 2004 playing golf.  This quote from Jerry Rice, which I read on, sums up Oakland’s attitude: "It just feels like the gods are not looking down on us.  Sometimes, things are meant to happen.  Hopefully the golf gods are going to start looking down on us.  I'm thinking about golf right now."

Tampa Bay (4-5) might catch a wild-card berth, but any thoughts of back-to-back Super Bowl victories died early this year.  The culprit has been the Bucs’ late-game defense, or lack thereof.  In this week’s loss to Carolina and against New Orleans and Indianapolis, the once-vaunted Buccaneer defense simply could not hold off the opposition in the fourth quarter.

Tick Tock, Coach Wannstedt
As I mentioned last week, Miami head coach Dave Wannstedt should update his resume before Christmas.  After jumping out to a 5-2 record, Miami seems poised to begin its December collapse early after two straight losses, including Sunday’s embarrassing 31-7 loss at Tennessee.  Miami has two home games coming up against beatable opponents, Baltimore (5-4) and Washington (4-5), before hitting the road for tough contests at Dallas (7-2) and New England (7-2).

The Dolphins need to get the ball to Ricky Williams.  Their quarterback mess—Jay Fiedler, Brian Griese, Sage Rosenfels—is hurting their running game.  These inept field generals get them in holes early, as Brian Griese did Sunday with two fumbles and three sacks in the first half.  So, Ricky Williams saw the ball 13 times for 37 yards after gaining a mere 36 yards last week against Indianapolis.

More Flutie Magic
Doug Flutie is a winner.  He showed it with Boston College with his Hail Mary in the Orange Bowl and subsequent Heisman Trophy.  He showed it in the Canadian Football League, winning six Grey Cups.  He showed it back in the NFL with Buffalo, stepping into the void left by Jim Kelly to jump-start the franchise.  Now in San Diego, he again shows the spark he can provide.  The 5-foot 9-inch, 41-year-old quarterback Sunday stepped in for not-ready-for-primetime Drew Brees and got an underachieving Charger team to live up to its talent with a victory over a good Minnesota squad, 42-28.

Last week's From The Armchair

Ward Lowe is a writer and editor in Austin, Texas, who believes that 2004 will be The Year for his beloved Boston Red Sox. You can reach him at