The Commish Online                                                                                
Take Me Out To The Ballgame
May 26, 2004

Attending a White Sox game at U.S. Cellular Field on Pepsi Half Price Night while sitting in the bleachers, I observed and learned a few things, some about baseball and some not:

It was a real slugfest out there, and the game even had a bunch of hits.  If Pepsi officials saw the crowd that turns out for these games, they might think twice about extending the sponsorship.

A sure way to get killed is to taunt Sox fans while sitting in their bleachers while wearing a Cubs shirt.
Valentin is spelled with 4 K's? Who knew?!
One of the night's MANY "altercations"
Any more than two "scoreboard races" (pizzas, hats, planes, frogs, etc.) is overkill.

An A.L. manager's job should depend more on his personality and his ability to keep a good clubhouse "chemistry" (take that, sabermetricians) than on any skills of strategy he may or may not have because there's just not a lot of managing that needs to be done - trot out a lineup, watch the pitch count on your starter, follow the basic lefty vs. lefty (and vice versa) strategy for pitching changes, and hope that your team is more talented than the guys in the other dugout.  Maybe that's why inexperienced skippers like Tony Pena and Ozzie Guillen are receiving such favorable reviews - it's about the players and they know that.
Paul Konerko is S-L-O-W, but you already knew that when your grandma passed him up while walking to the pharmacy for her pills.

Apparently Jose Valentin is spelled with four K's.

A Texas outfield of Chad Allen, Eric Young, and Gary Matthews, Jr. is unlikely to put fear in any opposing pitchers.
The useless scorecard
Keeping score at the game is a useless endeavor, seeing as how I will throw out the scorecard shortly after, but it did remind me just how overmatched Jose Valentin was at the plate, being the only White Sox starter to not get a hit.  In fact, Valentin couldn't even put the ball in play against lefty Kenny Rogers.  It might be time to consider switch hitting again, Jose.

The harder you try to get on television, the more the camera will avoid you.  Just ask "Paul's Posse," a Paul Konerko fan club(?) consisting of about half a dozen teenage boys and one girl, all decked out in homemade t-shirts with a "14" on the back and "Paul's Posse" on the front.  Don't ask.
Valentin's not so impressive day of the office.